add me on www.myspace.com/xxcyanxx

SCREAMS.

FIGHTS.

There is nothing I can do.

I cant set things right.

I feel helpless.

I feel alone.

I wish I could do something.

But how to help you is unknown.

I love you

But I don't think you love me back

Is there something wrong with me?

Is there something I lack? 

I give my heart too you

With only one catch.

Don't break it

I want it back without a scratch!

VICTORIA FRANCES

" If thou wilt be mine, I shall make thee happier than god himself in his paradise. The angels themselves will be jealous of thee. Tear off that funeral shroud in which thou art about to wrap thyself. I am beauty, I am youth, I am life. Come to me! Together we shall be love."

Theophile Gautier, Clarimonde

A bullet to my heart,

Heals quickly when I see you,

You are my one and ownly

I love you and u love me too

We will be together forever as one,

Hating life, but loving each other!

I died that night with the gun

You bought me back to life with one touch!

FOREVER TOGETHER AS ONE!

ok ok you guys are probably getting sick of all my silly journals but i can't talk to anyone else in real life so this is my only escape!

Today was my worst day ever, im usually alone during class and people are a tiny bit nice to me, but today i was so effin lonely and everyone was so mean to me, and then i felt empty the hole day with absolutley no one to talk to so i kept it all inside.

anyways, everyone was teasing me about my hair! they were spreading rumours that i h8ed my mates, and my mates believed them!! so now i have only one person to talk to!! i spose they arnt rlly friends, if they didnt believe me!

and worst of all since i've been keeping all this stuff inside, wen i got in the car i fell apart crying and now my mum knows somethings up, and shes gonna make evrything worse!!

well thx for listening if u actulli read this.....cyan xxx

the girl who has a brain

but chooses to hide it

for she believes it isnt cool,

Her poetry is is a great piece of art

but no one knows about it

for she believes they will tease her,

She would really like to wear black and purple all the time

but her wardrobe is full of pink

for she believes that if she doesnt wear pink, she will be exluded from the crowd!

she is right about getting teased for writing poetry, she is right about getting excluded from the crowd, and she is prolly right about brains not being cool! but they arnt the right people to hang around!

but that should not matter if you have a smart brain, then use it!, if your good at poetry, then show it! and if you want to wear black and purple, then wear it! dont do what others thinks is cool or right, do what you think is cool and right, AND BE YOURSELF!!!

 xox cyan xox

Deay diary,

why does evryone judge me before they know me? they always label me and and try to tease me about stuff that i am not! cant they get in their heads that im just being me! I just ignore them when they are being mean, but i cant ignore everything, the pain is just getting to much too handle, and i cant seem to get rid of it! even the music isnt helping my sorrows, i dont know what i am to do. :( I have no one to talk to about my hurt, and no one cares, the only person who i can talk to u is u my diary!

goodbye to u my diary and i hope i hear back from you with answers to my problems

XoX cyanXoX

I'm gonna paint a picture, a picture with a twist,                                                                            

 I'll paint it with a razor blade and i'll paint it on my wrist!

And when i paint my picture a red fountain will appear,

And with that magic red fountain all my problems will disappear!

these lies have affected me

messed up my head,

my friends aren't who they used to be

they all wish i was dead.

who can i trust

i thought i knew,

all my friendships have turned to rust

i can't even trust a few.

they can all get fucked,

for not believing in me,

my life is mucked

but i aint going back to what i used to be!!

YOU CAN'T TRUST ANYONE

What are you suposed to do?

When your so sad but no one cares,

who are you going to trust or talk to?

No one because they will just laugh!

SHE

she cries

she's hurt

she cuts

she's scared

she screams

she's lonely

she cries because you hurt her, she cuts because you scare her,

she screams because she is lonely from everyone betraying her

do you ever think about the pain you cause her.

who am i

nobody knows

i don't even know

am i being myself

or am i just hiding

do people really like me

i have fun sometimes

othertimes i feel alone

can i trust anyone

i think i can't

i thought i didn't care

i guess i actualli do

i can't keep up the act

of being strong

i just want to break down and cry..

I HAVE SHARED MY FEELINGS

THE SECRETS OF MY LIFE

NOW THEY ASK WHY ARE YOU UPSET

DEPRESSED

AND BORING ALL THE TIME

MAYBE IT'S COS I OST THE THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD

I HAVE TOLD SOMEONE THOSE THOUGHTS

NOW ITS IS OUT IN THE OPEN

AND I AM READY FOR THE TORMENT

AND THE ONLY PERSON I CAN BLAME IS MYSELF

WHY DID I DO THAT

SHARE THOSE SECRETS, THOUGHTS, FEELINGS